Hey, Mocha Divas!
I hope that all of you are enjoying an awesome week. It seems like the days are flying by. Hard to believe that it’s mid-February. Now that Valentine’s Day is over, let’s get down to some real talk again. Do you ever feel like things are just out of sorts in your life? Perhaps things at work are a bit off, or you’re juggling so many things, but not making progress on much. Insert a multitude of scenarios here and you get my drift. There is nothing wrong with being at that point. We all get there at various times in our lives. It’s part of the journey. We just need reassurance that it’s OK to press the “reset” button.
We can learn a lot from our electronic devices. You know when your cell phone or computer starts running slow, you typically just power it off for a few minutes, then turn it back on and miraculously it starts running smoothly again. At least that’s what I typically do. Most times this method works out and all is right with the device again. The same holds true for us as humans. When we start moving in slow motion, feel like we are in a fog, or just feel overwhelmed, we need to power down or unplug. In our quest to always be on top and have plenty to do (or at least the appearance of), we are running ourselves ragged. Our bodies and brains weren’t built to just run, run, run. We aren’t electronic devices. We can’t just replace our battery and resume play.
Now what about that “reset button?” Glad you asked. True confession: I have some moments where I become overwhelmed and I just stop and don’t do anything. In these moments, I realize that I have allowed myself to get too far – I have overheated – and my body and brain just stop. This isn’t a good thing, so hear me out. My goal is to minimize these moments. Instead of a shutdown, I need more moments of unplugging or resetting. Please recognize that there is a difference between overheating and powering off. One is an involuntary motion and the other is voluntary. I often say that the body has a way of getting what it needs. We can either listen and make the adjustments or ignore the signs, and the body will shut down.
We give so much of ourselves, yet we rarely take the time that we need for our well-being. It’s time to change that narrative. There is no honor for wearing ourselves out. Who benefits from that? I’ll wait.
My favorite way to unplug or reset is what I have deemed as “lazy, crazy days.” I live for these days because I intentionally have no commitments, tasks, or responsibilities. It’s my time to just be. I’m finding more ways to add these types of days in my life in 2018. I have already scheduled a couple of them during the week over the next month or so. Again, we need this – it’s no longer optional.
What are some other ways to unplug or reset? Glad you asked. Shut off social media. Yes, I said it. Social media is consuming our lives. We are allowing others’ “highlight reels” to keep us in a constant state of fret. I had this very conversation with a girlfriend recently. We are comparing our imperfect lives to someone else’s staged perfection on social media. Stop it. Unplug from social media for one day and notice the difference it makes in your disposition. I dare you to try it. Don’t get me wrong, social media has its place. It’s a great way to connect with old friends and former classmates. It’s also a great way to network, promote your business, etc. It becomes an issue when we spend so much time on social media that it takes over our lives. I’m not telling you what I heard. I’m telling you what I know.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.” – Theodore Roosevelt
Another way to unplug or reset is to stop and reassess where you are at this moment in time. There are moments when we are traveling along this on this journey called life and we are just going through the motions, seemingly in a fog. Either we have gotten comfortable and we start coasting along, or we have forgotten our “why” and we are trying to figure out who we are and/or what we are suppose to be doing. Ever felt like this? Oh, OK. Just me. These are usually signs of a need to press “reset.” Now, in Apple terms, a “reset” results in restoring your device to factory settings. Unfortunately, we (humans) don’t get to restore to factory settings. Although we can’t restore to factory settings, we can stop and regroup. Revisit your “why.” It may change depending on your current season in life. My “why” has changed a few times over the years based on various stages of my life.
My book club, Mocha Divas – The Book Club (shameless plug), read Shonda Rhimes‘ book, “Year of Yes” a couple of years ago and it was a game-changer for me. I read the paperback and listened to the audio book a few times. She spoke to my soul. She spoke to the essence of Mocha Divas. Shonda described how she responded when someone asked, “Shonda, how do you do it all?” She emphatically responded, “I don’t. Whenever you see me somewhere succeeding in one area of my life, that almost certainly means that I am failing in another area of my life.” That’s it. Simple. Nobody, I repeat, nobody has it all together. Trying to have it all together (or appear to have it all together) will result in overheating and eventual shutdown.
Remember when I introduced Mocha Divas to the world (here)? I stated that my desire is to inspire and encourage you to live in the NOW while recognizing that there is no such thing as perfection. Repeat. There is no such thing as perfection. We are imperfect beings. Grasping this concept will allow us to level set our expectations – not for others, but for ourselves. Stop being so hard on you. You got this. One step at a time. One day at a time. We only get one shot at this thing called life. Let’s make the most of it. It’s time to live our best life NOW.
I want to hear from you. What are your favorite ways to reset or unplug? Have you even recognized that this is necessary? I would love to hear your thoughts. While you’re at it, subscribe to the blog and share with other ladies. Your support is appreciated.
Live. Laugh. Love.